The Whole-y Trinity
If you want a cheat sheet for my work, look no further than the Whole-y Trinity, my name for the three identities that you naturally embody. Understanding this is critical because each of them have a different function and a different voice; the ability to distinguish between them and recognize when they are each surfacing to express is the key to facilitating your own healing and emotional mastery.
1. Your Divine Intuition
2. Your Adult Self (conscious, thinking)
3. Your Inner Child (unconscious, feeling)
All of these are within you and they create the framework for your entire physical, mental and emotional experience of this lifetime. Here’s how they break down:
This is the Captain of the mind/body/spirit ship. An infinitely loving presence that is alive in you and working on your behalf, always (not just mostly, not just when you play by the rules; ALWAYS). This is your purest essence. It’s the spiritual source you came from, it’s the spiritual source you will return to, and for the time in between it’s the intuitive force that guides you to every instance of prosperity, love, connection and joyful self-expression.
If Intuition is the Captain, then your Adult Self is the First Mate. This the human, conscious, physical expression of yourself in the here and now; the one who loves truffle fries and pays the bills and looks great in red. The Adult Self is also the thinking part of you, the ego mind that loves to separate from Intuition and go through life alone, obsessing over past events and future possibilities, which means instant misery for you and pretty much everyone around you.
Ideally, the Adult Self embraces Intuition as an ever-loving parental entity and walks through life with faith in omni-present spiritual wisdom and care. A healthy Adult Self accepts that she is not in control of future results, nor is she a victim of past circumstances; she is purely in command of her emotional response to the moment at hand… Which means her one and only function is parenting her Inner Child.
I’m stuck in this ship metaphor now, so I suppose if Intuition is the Captain and your Adult Self is the First Mate, then your Inner Child is the baby on board who didn’t ask for any of this and needs someone to change her and feed her and notice if she’s crying and also check in periodically to hug her and tickle her toes and make sure she’s not seasick.
Your Inner Child is the most vulnerable part of you. The part that carries all of your past wounds and inherited belief systems. The part that has no words, only emotion, and so when she has something to say, she has no choice but to freeze or yell or cry so that you’ll pay attention. Any parent who is in tune with their baby knows that kids have different cries for different needs (hunger, fatigue, teething, etc). Similarly, a healthy Adult Self listens to her Inner Child's feelings when they bubble up, can identify the core need that they’re pointing to (feeling unsafe, craving validation, needing help, etc.), and can step in to satisfy that need in a healthy, constructive way.
And there you have it! The Holy Trinity: Your Inner Child cradled and parented by your Adult Self and your Adult Self cradled and parented by Divine Intuition. One big, happy, internal family.
As far as I’m concerned, The Holy Trinity is the irrefutable foundation of self-healing. That’s been my experience personally and my observation professionally, and I’d go so far as to say that no emotional and spiritual healing can be truly fulfilled unless it originates from this understanding. A failure to honor the relationship between your Adult Self and your Inner Child will forever prohibit sustainable healing of the root causes of your feelings and behavior. A failure to honor the relationship between your Adult Self and Divine Intuition will forever leave you with inadequate support to reparent your emotional baggage.
Basically, you can’t heal your sh*t if you don’t reparent that spiritually wounded part of yourself. And you can’t reparent a spiritually wounded part of yourself if you don’t have an infrastructure of unconditional spiritual support holding you steady.
The Whole-y Trinity gives you a clear blueprint for your healing: Quiet your mind, feel your feelings, and respond to the world from a grounded and loving place. Once you get it down, you’ll never wanna go back. It’s a rhythm and a practice and it’s the surest route to irreversible peace and lasting joy.
Love and magic,